Chapter 32 That evening when I board the plane for my team's flight, Penn flops down in the seat beside me. We're quiet during takeoff, which isn't unusual for a long flight. The guys tend to chill and get some rest when we're in the air, but my interaction with Penn earlier-and my vow to be a better friend-is still playing in my mind. To the point that when we're finally at cruising altitude, I find myself speaking up. "I was talking to my therapist." "Huh?" Penn turns to face me, his expression confused. "Earlier. You asked me what I was doing in Ally's room when she wasn't home. I was talking to my therapist." Penn looks shocked as all hell for a moment by my random admission, before he blinks slowly, screwing up his mouth to the side like he's thinking carefully about what he wants to say. "Listen, I wasn't trying to make things weird. I know you like your solitude and all that." His eyes flit down to his lap. "But you know I'm your best friend, right? If you ever want to talk...about anything. I'm here." I'm stunned for a second, then I nod. This is the perfect moment to work on being a better friend, to be...vulnerable. I hate that word. "Yeah, man," I say. "And you can talk to me about anything, too." He breathes a laugh. "That's the thing. I already tell you everything." Another fissure strikes through my wall at his statement. I know he's right. I know about his troubled childhood, I know what he does every summer, I know about his high school girlfriend who broke his heart...I know Penn. I try to swallow, but my throat feels thick. This is your chance, Noah. "Actually," I say, keeping my voice low. I'm working on opening up to Penn and Fisher...not every man on this damn plane. "I've been kind of struggling with anxiety." His eyes widen like he's surprised by my statement. Probably because I never share anything. "Yeah? How long has it been going on?" I shrug. "Off and on since I was a kid and my parents were killed in a car accident." He shakes his head, his dark brows pinching. "I'm sorry, man. I had no idea that's what happened to them." "Well, in your defense, I never talk about it." He breathes a laugh through his nose. "True." "Anyway, that's why I have a therapist." Penn smirks. "And Ally's bedroom is the only place in the loft with wifi to talk to your therapist?" "No," I admit a bit sheepishly. I've opened up enough for today, and I'm ready to get his attention off of me. "So, what's new with you?" He slumps back in his seat with a sigh. "Well, there's this girl who lives in our building. Remember that chick who chewed me out after our party last month?" I chuckle. "Yeah." "Well, I've seen her a couple of times in passing since, and I remembered her because she's hot in a nerdy, smart person kind of way." He pauses and I nod, showing him I'm listening. "Anyway, I cranked up some music while I did my laundry a couple days ago and she showed up and started banging on our door. I cracked a joke, asking if she was there to ask me out, getting my flirt on because she was just as hot as I remembered, but then she started shouting at me for being too loud and said she was trying to write a disser-I dunno, some long ass word." "Dissertation?" He smiles. "Yeah! You're so smart, Downsby." I withhold an eye roll. "Then I saw her in the parking garage, and she was holding hands with that puckwit, Chadwick Weatherby." I actually gasp at this, I'm riveted now. "Chad-dick?" He purses his lips. "Yep. The one and only king of the dicks." "Wow. Small world. Better stay far away from her if she's into guys like that," I warn him. Chadwick Weatherby is Penn's high school and college rival. The jerk seduced Penn's high school sweetheart...Penn was heartbroken. Chadwick now plays for Sacramento, who we'll play for the first time this season in a couple of weeks. "Tell me about it," he agrees. "I don't even care that she's got that whole hot nerd thing going on." The flight attendant stops at our row to take our drink orders. I always just ask for a bottle of water, but today, I look at my friend. "Wanna have a beer with me?" He studies me for a beat like he's wondering who I am and where the aliens hid his real friend. "Puck, yeah." He hands us each a Modelo, and we clink them together. Something about this moment feels like a fresh start. A chance for me to do this friendship thing the right way. Soon after we finish our beers, Penn falls asleep. I take advantage of the privacy to text Ally. I haven't talked to her all day. Noah Hey, beautiful. How was your day? I wait a moment then a photo comes through that steals my breath. It's a selfie of my girl in just her leo and a big smile. I bite my bottom lip and hold back a groan. Ally is a lot of things; funny, sweet, smart, strong...but she's also a total smokeshow. Ally It was good! Had fun coaching the girls then worked on my routine. Noah Glad you had a good day. And that photo is very, very hot. Ally you can look at the pic when you're missing me. I'll be looking at that photo for a long time tonight, that's for damn sure. Ally Send me a pic, too. It's only fair. I check to make sure Penn is still sleeping and scroll through my phone for a pic of me that's not with my nieces. I finally find one I snapped a few weeks ago when I was shirtless in bed with Harry Styles curled up on my lap. There's a sentence I never thought would go through my mind. Ally Respectfully, Noah...you are one fine ass man. I snort a laugh, which wakes Penn up. Quickly I lay my phone face down on my lap. "What's so funny?" he asks. "Nothing." I close my eyes and pretend to sleep, but really I'm just thinking about the photo Ally sent me. 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