Chapter 17 Her fingers trail over my chest, tracing the lines of muscle like she's memorizing me. I feel the tremor in her fingers, the quick rise and fall of her breath, yet there's no hesitation in her movements. I lie back when she nudges me, my body already thrumming with anticipation, my eyes locked on her like I'll lose her if I blink. She straddles me, thighs snug against my ribs, her heat brushing against me in exquisite torture. I reach up to run my hands along her sides, her ribs, her hips, trying to anchor myself. She's so goddamn beautiful like this, flushed and fierce and trembling just a little, as undone by this as I am. Her fingers slide down to my waistband, dragging my pants lower until I kick them off the rest of the way. Her gaze dips, and she lets out a small, breathy laugh, almost in awe. It shoots straight through me, somehow making me even harder. "Nicole," I murmur, my voice low and rough. "You don't have to⁠-" "I want to," she says, cutting me off with a quiet certainty that sets my blood on fire. "I told you. More than anything." Her fingers wrap around my cock, and my hips jerk before I can stop myself. I swallow a curse. Her touch is careful but confident, and when she positions herself and starts to sink onto me, I swear I forget how to breathe. My hands fly to her hips, anchoring me while I fight for control, but her heat swallows me inch by inch-tighter than I remembered, wetter than I ever imagined. "Fuck," I groan, my head falling back as I fill her completely. "You feel so fucking good, Nicole." She stills for a heartbeat, adjusting to me, palms splayed over my chest. The look in her eyes is wild and unguarded, like she's just as overwhelmed as I am. I reach up and cup her face, brushing my thumb along her jaw. "You okay?" I ask, my voice barely above a whisper. She nods. "You?" "Fuck yes," I mutter, earning a soft laugh that vibrates through her whole body, and right through mine. Then she starts to move. Slow at first, rocking her hips in a rhythm that makes my blood burn and my control unravel. I grip her waist, guiding her, watching the way her body rolls against mine. She's mesmerizing. Every sound she makes, every flicker of expression on her face, etches itself into my brain. I sit up suddenly, wrapping an arm around her waist and capturing her mouth with mine. Her moan is swallowed by the kiss as I shift us, turning her beneath me in one smooth motion. She gasps as her back hits the mattress, but she doesn't break the kiss. Her legs wrap around my waist, pulling me deeper into her body, and I lose myself in her completely. She has no idea what she's doing to me. My control slips, fraying at the edges with every breath she takes, every soft sound she makes beneath me. I brace one hand beside her head, the other trailing from her throat to her chest, palm splaying between her breasts as I bury myself in her again, harder this time. Her body arches, her mouth falling open on a gasp that cuts straight through me. "Sergei," she breathes, fingers clinging to my shoulders. Her nails dig in as I thrust again, again, building a rhythm that makes the bed creak beneath us. "I've thought about this," I growl against her neck, dragging my lips along the sensitive skin there. "Thought about you. Every goddamn night since we met." She shudders beneath me, her legs tightening around my waist. "Me too." Her voice is breathless. I pull back just enough to look into her eyes. "Did you touch yourself thinking about me, Nicole?" Her breath catches, her cheeks blooming with color. She nods. The image makes my cock twitch inside her. My voice drops lower, rougher. "Tell me." She swallows hard. "You fucking ruined me," she breathes. "I'd try to ride my hand like it was you, to make myself come as hard as you did, but it was never the same." I grip her hip tighter, dragging her down the bed slightly as I thrust deep and slow. She gasps, her head falling back against the pillow. "Like this?" I ask. "Yes," she pants. "Exactly like this." There's something primal about the way she moves against me, the way her body welcomes me like it's been waiting for this. For me. I want to take my time, to draw this out, but every inch of me is begging for more, deeper, harder, closer. So I give in. I kiss her like I'm starving, like her mouth is the only thing that can feed me. Her hands tangle in my hair, her hips rising to meet every thrust. I lose myself in the sound of her voice, in the heat of her skin, in the way she cries out when I hit just the right spot. She's close. I can feel it in the way her pussy tightens around me, the way her breath stutters. "Look at me," I whisper, brushing her hair off her face. Her eyes flutter open, glassy and wide. "I want to see you when you come." She nearly screams with pleasure as she dreamily locks eyes with me, and then her body arches off the bed, trembling around me as she falls apart. I follow her over the edge a moment later, groaning her name against her skin like it's a prayer as I spill deep inside her. We collapse together in a tangle of limbs and sheets, our bodies slick with sweat and our chests heaving. For a long moment, neither of us speaks. We just lie there, tangled up, holding each other like the world doesn't exist beyond these four walls. When I finally lift my head, her eyes are still on me, soft and searching. "You okay?" I ask, brushing her damp hair back from her forehead. "Perfect," she murmurs with a delicate smile I press a kiss to her shoulder, then her cheek, then her lips. And for a brief, dangerous moment, I let myself believe this could be something real, something lasting. And if I were someone else, maybe it could be. But even in the afterglow, I know she's far too good for me and the darkness I bring with me. I tuck a strand of hair behind her ear and brush my lips over her cheek. Her skin is still warm and flushed, but she looks at me with guarded anticipation. She knows what comes next, and there's almost disappointment in her eyes. I kiss her one more time, slow and lingering, hoping it'll erase whatever tug-of-war is playing out in her mind. "I have to go back to my office," I murmur reluctantly, reaching over the bed to pick up the shirt I threw to the floor. "There's something I need to handle." She nods, her gaze slipping away from mine as she sits up and pulls the blanket tighter around herself. "Okay." Her voice is soft, and she doesn't fight or ask me to stay. I move around the room quietly, grabbing the rest of my clothes and getting dressed without rushing, though every second I linger, I want to crawl back into bed with her. My body feels magnetized to her, and I know I'll only feel whole when I'm buried deep inside her. But real life is knocking, and I can't put it off any longer. This has been perfect, extraordinary, but it also wasn't in my plans for the day. She watches me, unmoving, and for a moment, it feels like she's seeing more than I want her to. Like she's looking through the layers I keep carefully stacked between myself and the world. I lean in, brushing a soft kiss against her lips. "Get some rest, malyshka," I tell her, wishing again that I could crawl back into bed and hold her for the rest of the night. She smiles back at me, but it doesn't reach her eyes. When I leave, I close the door gently behind me and walk down the hall, every step heavier than the last. My mind is already snapping back into work mode, specifically onto the report Sasha left for me earlier. But even with everything going on, I can't stop replaying the look on Nicole's face. She'd looked distant at the end, like she was already building a wall between us. There's something deeper in the way she looked at me just now, like part of her wants to get closer while the other part is already halfway out the door. I hate the thought that any part of her regrets what we've done. I can't bear for her to see this as a mistake. Until now, Nicole's been the least complicated part of my day. Maybe sleeping with her again has complicated things more, or maybe I just finally let myself acknowledge exactly how much I want her. In a romance-themed observation show, several participants undergo a series of interactions and conflicts filled with love, misunderstandings, and power struggles. In the end, one couple rises to over...