Chapter 16 +25 BONUS Chapter 16 Chapter 16 But in the end, Irvin's urgency wasn't for me. Without a second thought, he swam straight to Julianne, cradled her, and made his way to the edge. He didn't even glance in my direction. Not once. I couldn't understand it. Why, when I'd already forgotten him and let go of my love, did it still hurt so much? The pond was deep. Jeremy had insisted on it because he loved deep-water swimming The depth overwhelmed me as I sank lower, struggling to find something to hold on to, but there was nothing. As I drifted deeper, heard Julianne's voice, soft and frantic. "Irvin, save Millie! Hurry!". Then came his cold, detached reply. "Leave her. She can swim. She'll be fine." I was drowning in fear and panic, barely able to breathe. But his words made my mind go blank. Right, I could swim! Back in college, I had even won a national swimming championship. How could I have forgotten? How could I lose all sense of reason and succumb to fear the moment I hit the water? I fought to remember and summon the instinct to swim to the surface. I didn't want to die-not after enduring so much pain and so many hardships that made life seem unbearable. I had survived all that. I didn't want to die here. I tried desperately to remember how to swim, but instead, a different memory surfaced. I finally realized why I couldn't swim anymore. It was because of that one time Irvin took me on a beach vacation in an uncharacteristic display of kindness. Originally, it was supposed to be just the two of us. But then, as always, he brought Julianne along. Angry and hurt, I refused to join them at the beach. When night fell, and Irvin still hadn't returned, I grew worried and went looking for him. I ran into Julianne, who seemed alarmed as she told me Irvin had gone swimming in deep water and hadn't come back. She didn't know what to do. I loved Irvin so much that her words sent me into a blind panic. I raced into the deep water to find him and swam desperately until I was utterly exhausted. But no matter how far I swam, I couldn't find him. As terror overwhelmed me, I suddenly felt a sharp pain in my lower abdomen and started bleeding. Because of the stress, my periods had always been irregular Therefore, I didn't even know I was pregnant until I lost the child I had longed for without ever knowing. When I woke up, Irvin didn't blame Julianne for misleading me. Instead, he had accused me of being thoughtless and causing my unborn baby's death. He'd said I was useless, that I should've drowned in the ocean. At the time, I thought he was right. How could I not have died in that ocean? 1/2 Chapter 16 +75 BOLUS Since then, I could no longer swim. Whenever I entered the water, I felt I deserved to drown. I had fought so hard to live by enduring unimaginable pain. No matter how inuch my body hurt, I had clung to life. But sometimes, I couldn't help but think about dying. I felt so tired and broken. Maybe I was meant to die in this water. Just as I gave up and allowed myself to sink into the dark, a figure appeared, swimming toward me. As Irvin carried Julianne away, he glanced back at the pond. Seeing that I hadn't surfaced yet, he frowned. Something felt off. No matter how skilled I was at swimming or holding my breath, I'd been underwater far too long. He wondered if I was really so stubborn that I'd risk my life just to make a point. The more Irvin thought about it, the more uneasy he felt. Just as he was about to put Julianne down and check the pond, someone else dove in. Moments later, they pulled my limp body out of the water. When Irvin saw me unconscious and unresponsive, his heart sank. He hurriedly dropped Julianne and rushed toward me. Julianne watched his frantic movements, and her hands tightened into fists. 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