Chapter 3 Standing on the sidewalk, I stare up at the luxury condo in a swanky downtown neighborhood, my neck craning up the six-story building. At the top is a penthouse apartment with a large balcony that is decorated in lush plants. Does the balcony have a sprinkler system? I sigh as I imagine the luxuries money brings. I'm happy with my choices, to save instead of spending my salary, but sometimes... I know I'm stalling. I should have gone straight inside, but I'm nervous to meet the man with the voice that wreaked havoc on my body all morning. Every time I thought of the sound of his honey baritone, I got warm all over again. Now is not the time for these kinds of feelings. Even if Cadence hadn't just disappeared again, I'm finally comfortable living this life on my own. I've stopped wanting a man, stopped wishing I could be a normal girl with regular reactions to sex. I'm just going to be weirdo me. Which is why I straighten my spine and hike my messenger bag strap further up my shoulder before I cross the street and enter the building. Which has a concierge... "Dimitri Ivanov, please," I ask with a smile, staring at the uniformed man in a cap and gloves. "Name?" he asks with a generic smile back. "Ava Tantor." "He's expecting you, Ms. Tantor." And then the concierge steps around his counter height desk and waves for me to follow him to an elevator separate from the bank of elevators at the back of the lobby. He inserts a key, the doors sliding open, as he sweeps his hand, inviting me into the interior. My brows are halfway up my forehead. The man with the honey baritone has a private elevator that can only be operated with a key. I just know I'm headed up to the penthouse. Sure enough, there is only one button in the elevator, the letter P emblazoned on it. I push the button as the doors close, the elevator whizzing up to the top floor. I've never been in one that went this fast. The doors open before I've even processed, and I can barely keep from gasping as the interior of the apartment appears. I'm in a stunning entry with marble floors, beautiful artwork displayed on walls that must be at least twelve feet tall. From a room I can't see, the most beautiful classical piano music fills the space. The speakers in this place must be amazing. Tentatively, I step out of the elevator, examining one of the pieces to the right. A landscape that I think might be an actual Monet. "Hello?" I call, taking another step into the hall. The piano music abruptly stops as I realize, it wasn't a recording I was hearing but an actual person playing. "Hello," that honey baritone calls. "Please come in, Ava." And then footsteps approach. In what feels like slow motion, I turn my head to the man walking toward me. Dear lord above, I'm in trouble. He's ridiculously tall, his shoulders so broad, he seems to fill the large entry. He has the sort of sharp, masculine good looks that are both refined and rugged, his dark hair sweeps back from his high forehead. He's older than me, a touch of gray at his temples. But it makes him look even more handsome. Distinguished. Powerful. Maybe it's the confidence with which he carries himself. He's breathtaking and I've lost the ability to speak. "Hi," I finally push out, sounding more like a schoolgirl than the professional woman I've become. I've already said hello. "Thank you." I chastise myself and then step forward, holding out my hand in an attempt to recover myself. "Pleased to meet you in person, Dimitri." "And you, Ava," he takes my hand, his easily twice the size of mine as his skin glides along my palm. It sends an absolute riot of sensation through my body, as I try to hold myself together. I'm not equipped for this. I have no point of reference for an attraction this strong. Or really any attraction at all. I try to make my brain work again as he keeps my hand in his, a small smile playing at his lips. Can he tell how I feel? The way he's affecting me? I try to shake it off even as his other hand comes to the outside of mine, my little hand completely engulfed in both of his. I resist the urge to fiddle with my hair as my cheeks heat. But that's when I notice. His hands... They're covered in sinister tattoos. I blink at them, trying to decide what they mean. "Umm," I say before I can stop myself, fumbling from both confusion and attraction. I don't do this. I take situations head on with a professional demeanor that makes people forget I'm still too young to be head of a department, and I put them at ease. "I'm hoping to ask you a few questions to help get your search for a nanny started." "I look forward to answering them. Let's have a seat in the living room. Can I get you something to drink?" "I'm good, thank you." He finally lets go of my hand and leads the way past a stunning, top of the line, kitchen and into a large living room with oversized leather furniture. Sure enough, in one corner is a baby grand piano. The kind I've only seen in hotel bars. The windows behind it offer a stunning view of the Las Vegas skyline. He gestures for me to sit on one sofa as he takes a seat in the other across from me. That's when a little girl toddles in from the hallway that must lead to the back of the apartment. She looks to be about three, with her dark hair in a high ponytail and her big brown eyes the picture of innocence. I give her a smile and a small wave. She doesn't wave back. "Who dat?" She points at me, her lips pulling into a tiny little adorable frown. Dimitri gets up and crosses the room to pick her up in his arms. "That is Ms. Tantor." "Ava," I say, returning to standing. "I'm so happy to meet you..." "Anastasia," he fills in for me. "But I call her Anna." "And how old are you, Anna?" She stares at me, ducking her head under Dimitri's chin. "Tell Miss Ava how old you are," he softly encourages. I like it. He's encouraging independence without any sharp note of judgment. "Free," she answers, curling deeper into Dimitri. "What a big girl," I gush, my smile growing. "Is she your only child?" "Yes." I clear my throat, this next question is always delicate. "Marital status?" "Widowed." My mouth opens as I look at the two of them, my heart breaking for both of them. "I'm so sorry for your loss." He gives a quick nod. "One of my aunts came from Russia and stayed for close to a year, but it was time for her to return home. I've tried two other agencies, but I've not had much luck finding the right nanny." I nod. "Despite being a temp agency, we have an excellent record of placing employees in permanent positions. I can provide you a short-term nanny only, while you search for a more a more permanent option, or I can help you find a person interested in temp to permanent." He gives a single jerk of his chin. "I need help now, but I'd like your help finding someone permanent. Thank you." "Not a problem." I sit again, smoothing my pencil skirt, before pulling out the intake forms from my bag. I begin entering in the information I've already discovered as Dimitri takes a seat on the couch across from me. "What sort of hours are you looking for?" "I work a great deal, often at odd times, so I'd like a live-in nanny." I frown. "Those are tough to find. There are overtime regulations and⁠-" "The pay is of no consequence." I'd picked up on that. "Would you be open to two different people in the role?" "I'd strongly prefer one." If I were less professional, or less attracted, I'd suggest he consider marrying again. What he really wants is a mother. "I'll see what I can do." I finish up my questions, placing the forms back in my bag. "Would it be possible for me to see Anna's room?" "Of course." The bedroom always gives me a good idea of what the caregiving parent values. "I can also show you the nanny's room." Dimitri stands, setting Anna down as he takes her hand and starts leading her out of the living room. She toddles next to him, her entire hand wrapped about one of his fingers. Honestly, it melts my heart to see it, and I have to keep a sigh from escaping my lips as my heels click on the floor behind them. We pass a large and well-appointed dining room on the way to a hallway with several doors. He opens the first, showing me a beautiful room for a little girl, decorated in pale pinks and dark wood furniture. It's pretty, yet serviceable, with books and sensory toys that are age appropriate. The room speaks of taste, sophistication, and careful parenting. "It's a beautiful room," I say with a smile. Dimitri nods. "Thank you. The designer made certain to work some of my furniture tastes in while ensuring it was appropriate for a little girl." Noted. Any nanny I choose, should be sophisticated enough to blend into this house and all the support staff that come with it. We step back out, entering the room just across the hall. It's a large room with a walk-in closet and an ensuite bath. "This will be the nanny's room." My brows lift. This is for hired help? I briefly wonder what the main bedroom looks like. "Very nice." "I tried to hire a woman from my home country, a friend of a friend, but it did not work out," Dimitri offers with a grimace. Anna lifts her arms to her father and Dimitri bends over to pick her up, his face coming close enough to mine that I catch a whiff of his cologne. He smells like fresh winter air and pine. I draw in a deep breath, wondering how the scent is even possible in the Vegas heat. He swings Anna into his arms, settling her on his hip as he straightens back up. "I'm sure we can find you and Anna a good fit." Anna holds out a hand to me, her fingers opening and closing like she's reaching out for me. It's so sweet, my chest gets tight as I slip my thumb into her palm, her fingers wrapping around it. My fingers close as I lightly stroke the back of her velvet hand. "With a little girl this adorable, it's going to be easy as pie." "Pie?" she asks, perking up. I laugh, giving her fist a light shake. My gaze drifts from Anna to Dimitri where my heart stops in my chest. The way he's looking at me, it's... I freeze, fighting the urge to back away. There is an aggression in his gaze that makes me want to run. Hide. I drop Anna's hand, my gaze dropping too, as I draw in a deep breath through my nose and then out my mouth, attempting to control the panic. It's ridiculous and unprofessional. I will my voice to work, to come out of my throat sounding normal. "Let me take a look at the candidates and see who might be a match. In the meantime, I'll contact Gertrude, an older woman who does short-term placements but isn't interested in long term work. She'll be a great interim fix while we're interviewing. I should hear back from her by this evening or tomorrow at the latest." "Thank you," he rumbles. "Your competence and professionalism have been most appreciated." His words help me relax as I shake off my reaction and walk back out of the room. I know I'm acutely sensitive in this regard. Another reason the nanny department works for me. I work with a lot more women than I do men. Retrieving my bag, I wave goodbye to Anna and then draw in a deep breath as I meet Dimitri's eye. I'm surprised when my body reacts again, the ache between my legs pulsing despite the fear I'd experienced just a minute ago. "You'll call me and let me know about the temporary placement?" "Of course," I nod. "Is there a time that's too late for me to phone?" "No, any time is fine." He reaches out his hand and I only hesitate for a second before I slip my fingers into his. There is no fear at his touch, in fact, red-hot excitement pulses through me. "I'll call you as soon as I've secured someone for the short-term position, but I'll also get started on your long-term placement." "Excellent. Thank you, Ava." He squeezes my hand, the slight pressure making my pulse jump. My breath catches as I fight down the attraction. This is a client, but more importantly...I don't do this-ever. I press my lips together as I try to get my body under control, pulling my hand from his before I smooth my pencil skirt over my hip. I dart my gaze to his just in time to note that his eyes are on my hands, following the trail. Just this once, I wish I could put my issues aside, take him up on the offer I think I see in his eyes. I know men find me attractive. I've got long blonde hair, blue eyes, a nice nose and mouth, a good figure. I work at being thin, but I'm curvy by design, so I fill out a bikini. I went to three different high schools in four years, and I'd had my pick of boyfriends. Not that I let things go too far, back then I was a little scared of the unknown and sex was some exciting, but mysterious act. Now, though, I'm petrified of the known. The moment where a man can completely dominate you and there isn't a thing you can do about it. That memory makes me draw in a deep, cleansing breath, filling my lungs, before I give him my bright, professional smile. "I'll be in touch." And then I turn, even as he presses the button for the elevator, the doors sliding open as I step inside. It isn't until the doors close, that I release the breath. And make a note. I have to do as few home visits with Dimitri Ivanov as possible. I've tried this before. Where I meet a man I decide I want to date. I mean, I've never felt the pull like I do with Dimitri, but still, I have attempted dating. The two other times I've felt an attraction the night ended the same. Me freaking out in the bedroom once clothes started coming off and his body climbed on top of mine. I just don't want to see the disappointment in his eyes when he realizes how broken I am. Which is why it's best to keep away from Dimitri Ivanov.