Chapter 21 The sight of Cadence's name on my phone sends a jolt of shock coursing through me. Kissing Anna's head, I stand up and hit the answer button, my heart pounding in my chest. "Hello." "Hey," Cadence answers. My free hand comes to my face, covering my eyes as relief wars with anger, love, and resentment. "You're all right." "I'm fine," she sighs. My mouth opens as words crowd my mouth. How could you do this to me? first on the list of things I'd like to say. But I swallow the words, remembering what I told Dimitri about letting Cadence go. "I'm glad." "I'm sorry I left without a word. I didn't think you'd understand." Listening to her words, I swallow down another lump as I fight for control. Dimitri wraps his arms around me, and lifts me off the floor, carrying me from Anna's room. "You're right. I didn't." I still don't. I guess I never understood half of what Cadence did growing up. But today isn't the day for that. I made a promise to Dimitri that I would accept her leaving my life if only I could get confirmation that she was safe. "I'm glad you're all right." "You're okay?" she asks back. "I'm fine, Cade. I'll be fine..." My throat closes and I press my forehead against Dimitri's neck, my eyes squeezing closed. "I wish you the best." "Ava," she says in a rush of air. "Don't say it like that. Like you don't want me anymore." "I think it's you who doesn't want me, Cadence. And that's all right. I want you to be happy. I always have." "Shit," she mutters. "It has nothing to do with you. Yes, you need to get out there and take some risks and really live life, but I'm the one who has been dragging you down. You just didn't see it. And I'm trying to get right so that I can be the friend you need instead of the selfish black hole who sucks up all your resources." She draws in a desperate, unsteady breath, before she speaks again. "I knew if I said that to you, you'd tell me I wasn't, and that you didn't mind helping me. But you should, Ava. You're way better to me than I deserve. Sometimes I seem angry because, I know I'm not just fucking up my life but yours too." Tears start leaking down my cheeks. "I'd go to hell for you, Cadence. You're not a black hole. You're not fucking up my life. You're my family. The only person who has ever protected me in this crazy ass world. I've always needed you as much or more than you needed me." "Shit," she chokes on her own tears. "I messed this up again, didn't I?" "It's fine. I forgive you. Do what you need to do, and then, maybe we can go to couples counseling or something." For a moment there is a pause and then she bursts out laughing. "For real?" "I went to one. A counselor. You were right. Five minutes in and I ended up on the floor with a panic attack. I clearly need some help. I'm going to go back. Try to solve these intimacy issues I'm carrying..." "Ava," Cadence gasps. "Were you telling her about Hank?" "You know I don't like saying his name." "I should have stabbed that fucker seven more times." "That's enough," a man rumbles in the background. "I can hear you getting worked up." "This is different, Zane. I'm allowed to be violent when someone I love is being attacked." My limbs turn to jelly. "I love you too." "I'm glad we talked," she whispers. "I don't know how you managed to get me on the phone with all the rules." "It's a long story but the juicy part is that I started dating." Dimitri finally lowers my feet to the floor, my body sliding down his. I smile into Dimitri's chest. Cadence pauses. "Shut up." "Yep. Can't wait to tell you." "Same. Same. We'll talk in a week when I'm back." There is a pause. Part of me, even now, doesn't want to hang up the phone, can't let her go again. But it's time I stopped hanging on so tightly. "Bye, Cadence. Good luck. I love you." "You too, Ava. Sleep tight." I smile, remembering the words we'd whisper to each other because we didn't have a mother to say them. I want to say more, but instead I hang up the phone. Dimitri holds me tightly, not saying a word. I let the silence fill the space between us, so glad for the comfort of his arms. I'd like to be mad at Cadence, but her leaving was the push I needed to find myself here. "I think I might be in love with you." His hands spread out on my back. "Good." "Good?" I lift my face to look up at him. "That's it?" "No. But it would be awkward to be married to me if you weren't. I tried that once, it doesn't work all that well." My brows lift. He leans down and kisses me. "What are we talking about now?" "I love you too. You are my future, Ava Tantor." "Oh," I flush, my hands resting on his chest. "That's lovely." He leans down and kisses me then. "I want to marry you." "Oh," I repeat. "That's fast." He chuckles, before his eyes grow more serious, narrowing. "Don't worry. You've got plenty of time to consider. I've got a few issues to work through as well while you do." "You've got issues?" From my perspective, he's got careful control of both his life and his feelings. "My father doesn't allow me access to my sisters. They are trapped in a prison of his cruelty." "That's awful," I gasp out, my hands lightly massaging his neck. "I'm forcing his hand, which means I'm poking a very large bear. I know you need time, and so do I. As soon as I've rescued my sisters, we can discuss the future again." I push up on tiptoe and kiss his lips. It doesn't surprise me he's trying to rescue more women. Dimitri is a man who cares for the women he loves, body, mind, and soul. I pull back a few inches, meeting his gaze again. "Can you tell me more?" Holding my face, he kisses me again. "I'll tell you all of it. But for today, let's just focus on you. Tomorrow, we can discuss my messed-up family and my narcissistic and sadistic father." I wince on his behalf. Because we have this in common. Really messed-up pasts. No wonder he understands me. And for the first time since I met him, Cadence is no longer between us. I'm free to just enjoy him. Which makes my stomach twist in fear. If life has taught me one thing, it's that moments like these carry a very heavy cost. At least for people like me, the second I relax, something terrible is about to happen...