Chapter 20 Chapter 20 +25 Bonus Three days later , Murphy finally saw the Gemma he had been longing for day and night . Gemma lay in the cryo - casket with her eyes closed . Her expression looked serene , as if she were simply asleep . Looking at his small , slumbering rose inside the cryo - casket , Murphy could not help but recall countless nights spent coaxing her to but recall countless nights spent coaxing her to sleep . Back then , she would lie in his arms just like this , with her long lashes curling upward , making her look as beautiful as a porcelain doll . The only difference now was that frost clung even to her eyelashes . Her complexion was so pale . It had to be freezing inside the cryo - casket . " Gemma , don't be afraid . I'll join you soon . Gemma , I'm sorry I lied to you , " Murphy said softly , reaching out as if to caress her pale cheek . But all he felt was the icy barrier of the cryo - casket's lid . He could not touch her - just as , so many times before , she had tried to reach his heart , only to be turned away ! " The truth is , Evangeline was never my girlfriend . I never loved her . The person I've always loved ... is you , " Murphy admitted . " But I was afraid to acknowledge it . I thought that if I admitted my love for you , it would be a betrayal - a betrayal of your parents . Your father was my closest friend , and your mother had always treated me as her own brother . How could I allow myself to have such sinful thoughts about their daughter ? " So , I couldn't admit it . I kept convincing myself you didn't really love me . You were too young to understand love . As