33- Feet go on the floor , not on the furniture . 100 % I wake up and I can tell that I haven't been asleep all that long . I also have no idea why I'm awake . Everything seems quiet . I'm almost back to sleep when I hear someone knocking at the door . Huh ? Who would be here ? Everyone ought to still be asleep . Yawning , I get to my feet , tuck my shiny gold coin into the waistband of my pyjama pants , and open my door and ... There's no one there . Was someone knocking at the back door ? Should I even answer it if they are ? Someone is still out to get me after all . But what if it's Laura or something . It's not like she can call ahead and tell me that she's here . I'm standing in the middle of the hallway , totally conflicted about what to do when the knocking sound repeats , making me jump . Except ... It doesn't sound like it's coming from the back door . Or any door . It repeats and I swear the sound is coming from below me . It takes my tired brain a moment to comprehend that . " Jane ? " I ask warily . The knocking repeats . Yeah , it's definitely coming from below me . Alright , Jane must want something . I suppose knocking is a fairly polite way of asking for my attention . I wonder how big the basement actually is . For that matter , I wonder how big Jane is . I head back down to the bar and I can immediately see why Jane is knocking . Right in the middle of the bar , stuck to one of the pieces of fly paper is what I can only assume , is a dust sprite . A glance shows me the trap door is still closed , I have no idea how Jane knew that a sprite had been caught , but it was nice of her to let me know anyway . Maybe she heard it or something . " Thanks Jane , I say excitedly as I approach the little sprite . Up close I can see it is about five inches tall and appears to be entirely made up of dust and bits of fluff . In a few of the less dense spots I can even see through it . I think the sprite is kind of cute and I start to feel bad for it , right up until the moment it sees me . " Oi you damn human . What the hell is your problem ? Do I come into your home and spread sticky stuff everywhere ? " It demands angrily . " Yes . " I answer flatly . " Liar ! " It accuses . I raise an eyebrow . " I am not . You come in here and leave sticky dust footprints over every clean surface in the place ! " I argue . " So ? This isn't your home , it's a bar . Besides , our artwork is beautiful , you should be 29 O ل 1/4 111 Г 12:01 Fri , Aug 29 Lesson 33- Feet go on the floor , not on the furniture . thanking us for making the place look pretty . I don't know why you keep ruining everything ! " It whines . " Actually , right now I'm living here , so this is my home . " I point out . The dust sprite scoffs at me and a little puff of dust leaves its mouth . " But this isn't a house ! " it insists . " No , but I'm stuck here anyway so I'm making the best of it . Look , it's a lot of work for us to constantly clean the bar every night . Could you please stop leaving your ... Artwork ... All over it ? " I try to keep my tone at least a little pleasant . " We are making it BETTER ! " The sprite glares at me and I sigh . " Look , I understand that you're trying to decorate , but even the prettiest decorations will look bad if you put them in the wrong place , and the bar is definitely the wrong place . Can't you decorate somewhere else ? " I plead . " No. Don't want to . Now let me go ! " It yells . " No , I don't want to . " I sass the creature and it huffs out dust again . " But you HAVE to ! " it whines . If its feet weren't stuck to the flypaper right now , I suspect that it would be stomping its feet . " Actually I don't . I could squash you flat , or roll you up in more sticky paper and throw you out into the alley . " I threaten . The creature whimpers and I reel it back in a little . " But I won't , because I'm not that kind of person . I am going to let you go . But you need to stop leaving your artwork on the bar and tables . As long as you leave them alone , I'll leave you alone . But next time you decorate them , I'll show you how I like to decorate . I'll buy a ladder , climb up to the rafters and scrub them clean . I'll dust every corner of this place until it's immaculate . " I say with a dead serious face so the dust sprite knows that I'm serious . The sprite is quiet for a moment before collapsing to its knees like its legs won't support it anymore . The little creature has burst into tears AND now its knees are also stuck to the fly paper . " Noooo , no , no , no . Please don't ruin our nest . Cruel human . " It cries . Little drops of mud made from dust and tears land on the fly paper in little grey smudges . DO 29 ل [ ] ] O 2/4 12:01 Fri , Aug 29 Lesson 33 - Feet go on the floor , not on the furniture . " Oh calm down . I won't mess with your nest as long as you stop decorating the bar . I'll find something else for you to decorate and give it to you in a few days , alright ? " I offer , feeling oddly guilty . The dust sprite is so tiny , I feel like such a bully . I also kind of wish I had my phone because I would love to take a photo of this thing . It's so cute ! The sprite sniffs and looks up at me with big grey eyes . " Really ? " It says in a childish tone . " Yes really . As I said , there's a time and place for decorating . Now , let me help you get free . " I lecture in my best kindergarten teacher voice . Being as gentle as I can , I let the dust sprite wrap its arms around one of my thumbs and use the other hand to carefully peel the fly paper off of it . I then move the sticky paper to the side and place the little creature on the cleared space . " Thank you . " It mutters grumpily . " You're welcome . I am going to clean up all the rest of these sticky papers , but remember , If you mess it up again , I'll go on a cleaning binge and next time I'll put out even more sticky papers . " I warn . " Fine . " The dust sprite grumbles . Then it jumps off of the bar , rushes over to a wall and climbs up it , spiderman style . Hmm ... The dust sprite looks a lot creepier like that . It's kind of bug - like as it climbs . I may need to re - evaluate its cuteness . I walk around the room and collect up all the fly paper sheets and stack them on eachother so that all the sticky sides are facing in . I did plan to wrap them in a plastic bag and leave them by the back door for Torin to take out to the dumpsters for me later , but as I pass Jane's trap door , I hesitate . " Hey Jane ? Do you want these ? I'll throw them out if you don't . I'm still a little unclear on what it is that you actually like to eat . Or even if you are eating these things . It's possible you're hoarding them , or just crushing them . I have no idea ... " I trail off when the trap door cracks open and a shadowy limb reaches towards me . It stops about a foot away from me and waits . I guess that's a yes then ? I place the fly paper gently on top of Jane's arm and she retreats back into her home . " Okay . Well , thanks Jane . I'm heading back to bed . " I tell her with a yawn . I stop in my new bathroom and scrub the fly paper glue residue off of my hands before stumbling back to bed , satisfied with my morning's work and completely exhausted .